Help for yourself


Hold on, pain ends”

You are not alone
Many of us have had suicidal thoughts at some point in our lives, feeling suicidal does not mean that you are crazy, or weak, or flawed. It only means that you have more pain then you can cope with right now. The pain may seem overwhelming but with time and support, you can overcome the challenges you face. The pain and suicidal feelings will pass. Some of the finest, most admired, leaders and talented people have been where you are now. No matter what your situation, there are people who care and that can support you to a place where you feel that life is worth living.
Why do I feel suicidal?
Many kinds of emotional pain can lead to thoughts of suicide. For example the emotional pain could be from financial stress, a relationship break up or difficulties, loneliness or you may not even know why. The reasons for this pain are unique to each one of us, and the ability to cope with the pain differs from person to person. We are all uniquely different.
Why suicide can seem like the only option
If you are unable to think of solutions other than suicide, it is not that other solutions don’t exist, but rather that you are currently unable to see them. With intense emotional pain it can distort your thinking so it becomes harder to think and identify possible solutions to problems, or connect with those that can offer support.
Reaching out for help

Although you may not feel or see it right now, there are many people who are there to help and support you through this difficult time. Reach out to someone who will listen and someone who you can trust. This could be friends, whānau/family, a teacher, counsellor, co-worker, GP or our 0800 LIFELINE ( 54 33 54 ), free text service – HELP (4357) or our Suicide Crisis Helpline 0508 828 865 or 0508 TAUTOKO.

How to talk to someone about your suicidal thoughts
It can be hard to start the conversation and opening up about your suicidal thoughts. This is very normal given the overwhelming emotional pain you are feeling which can make it hard to find your voice and the words to say.

It is important to remember:

  • Tell the person exactly what you are telling yourself. If you are having thoughts or have a suicide plan, explain it to them.
  • If saying it is too difficult then try writing down your thoughts and feelings of suicide and hand it to the person you have chosen to talk with. Sit with them as they read it.
  • Or you could call them, text them or even send them an email but remember to be clear about your thoughts or intentions of suicide. Be very clear ‘I am feeling suicidal’, and ‘I have a plan’.
What if you don’t feel understood?

If the first person you reached out to doesn’t seem to understand, tell someone else, reach out to professionals or call 0800 LIFELINE. We understand it can be hard but don’t let negative responses stop you from finding someone who can understand and help.

Helplines and local mental health services PDF